Aini frowns. “What you mean?”“Contraband,” intones Heidi ominously. “My dad smuggled it in last business trip.”“Aiyah, Didi. Careful lah!” Aini looks around, checking that there is no chance they will be overheard. There isn’t, of course: Heidi’s parents are out, it is the amah’s day off, and Heidi’s garden is large and private.Heidi continues to tease. “Banned substances, Nini! Twelve strokes of the rotan for possession, from Lee Kuan Yew himself! Want see?”Now Aini is worried. “Didi, no! What are you talking about?”Heidi puts on a deeply serious prime ministerial face, before breathing, sotto voce: “Bubblegum!”There is a pause, before Aini squeals in realisation, playfully slapping her friend on the shoulder in mock remonstration. “Aiyah, you silly tease! ‘Contraband’ – you bluffing me ah!” They burst into laughter together, before Heidi leaps up, runs inside the house and emerges a minute later with a tub of the banned substance.“Wah! Dubble Bubble! My favourite!” grins Aini. “Can. “Yes, I am. I only like beautiful people and I only hook up with girls I like.”Sheila took a sip from her mimosa as I stood and nervously wiped one of the bar glasses in my hand.“Do I make you nervous?” she asked.“No,” I replied. “Why?”“Well,” she replied, “You’ve been cleaning the same glass for the entire time we have been talking, so I, just wondering.”She had me and again, she knew it.“So, are you single?” she asked.“Yes,” I replied. “What about you?”“I married to a big black guy who’s six foot four and weighs close to two sixty,” she replied.I guess the look of shock must’ve crossed my face. She quickly flashed her toothy white smile and added, “I got ya.”She took a sip of her drink and leaned forward in my direction, looking to her right and then her left, before asking in almost a low whisper,“If I wear a shirt in here that reads, ‘I like white dick,’ would that offend you?”My quick-witted self, replied, “Do you?”“Do I what?” she asked.“Do you like white dicks,” I.
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